I thought a lot about perfume today.
The catalyst to this thought process was walking into the girl’s bathroom, and inhaling that all too familiar scent of what I like to call Shit-fume. It’s that flowery, noxious odor that is created by taking a smelly crap, and then spraying your favorite perfume profusely throughout the room.
Like I can’t tell you took a number two…
Personally, I don’t see the point in perfume.
If you wear Love Spell, and your significant other is the first to smell it on you, that’s fantastic because statistically he will associate that smell with you forever.
And if you break up, you are able to psychologically torture him without ever seeing him.
But, if your new boyfriend’s ex wore Love Spell, every time he gets close to you he will think of her.
I am confused by the world’s confusion towards dating.
We do many things to sabotage our own happiness, but perfume is probably the stupidest blockade we set up.
Instead of flaunting our own pheromones, we disguise our unique smell, biologically designed to help us hook up with people we’re compatible with, and then wonder why it all goes to shit.
This is also a very accurate metaphor for every other dating problem known to human kind.
Stop wearing perfume.
Plus it’s bad for the environment.