“Is trendy good?” sounds like a title from Sex and The City

Feminism is chic. Whether or not you want to admit it, as a feminist you are partaking in one of today’s hottest trends and I can’t figure out if that’s a good thing.

In my opinion, with all things that go mainstream there is an equal amount of good and bad that comes with the exposure. The good being a lot of people become aware of whatever fad has achieved limelight status (music, social issue, celebrity. . .), the bad being a massive amount of mis-education.

I guess the real question is does the good outweigh the bad?

The good things about the popularity of feminism are numerous. For a start, people who have general idea can start conversations that open up the doors for learning more about the cause. Also, as women start to demand certain levels of respect, the oppression and degradation of women becomes less socially acceptable. Having a voice is powerful and popularity makes that voice louder.

On the flip side:

When something is cool it becomes socially expected that people have some knowledge on the topic, so they skim and get the “gist” of an idea to be somewhat conversational. With people partially learning about a concept a lot of wrong information gets received and consequently put out into the world.

Yes, women’s issues are the crux of feminism, but they are not the end all be all on the subject and it certainly is not as simple as “girls rule, boys drool”.  Additionally, the hypocrisy of calling out equality for women and then degrading your sisters is not a hypocrisy lost on the critics of feminism.

So does the good outweigh the bad?

I think so.

I do think that more people knowing about feminism is a good start to the conversation, but that we need to hold one another accountable for being educated and practicing what we preach.

As always I would love to hear what anyone else thinks about the trendiness of feminist. Is it good? bad?  Comment or find me on all the social media sites.  Literally all of them. I even have an Ello.

Until next time. ❤

In Case You Missed John Oliver

A friend of mine pointed me towards this video and I wanted to share it all with you as further affirmation that sexual education in the USA is embarrassing.

http://www.rollingstone.com/tv/news/watch-john-oliver-blast-subpar-sex-education-in-u-s-schools-20150810

Below is an article my friend Tweeted at me about the video above.

http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/john-oliver-eviscerates-american-sex-ed-but-the-reality-is-even-worse-20150813

Sexism in our Sexual Education

Untitled

By Chris Mongeau. For more photos by this photographer, visit: https://www.flickr.com/photos/untitledfragment/

On optimistic days I like to think that what I call “crisis sex education” is an imperfect movement away from abstinence based education in the sense it acknowledges kids are going to have sex regardless of what we tell them.

On pessimistic days I think the crisis approach is more damaging.

The move away from abstinence based sexual education (as far as I can surmise) came from a push to acknowledge that kids are going to have sex.

The problem is that the acknowledgment comes in the form of “if you’re going to have sex anyway, here’s how a condom works. The end.”

Comparatively speaking, I had great sexual education. I actually learned about the elusive female condom (though they never did show us how to actually use it. . . ) However, despite this relatively good education, I hated sex for a long time.

I remember my first boyfriend asking me “did you go?” the first few times we had sex and I just answered yes because it seemed like the correct answer. “Go where?” I thought. Eventually I figured out I was supposed to be feeling something that I wasn’t.

I thought my vagina was broken. I had no idea there was a female part of sexual intercourse that was supposed to be greatly pleasurable for me.

Courtesy of porn I “learned” about the female orgasm, merely in the sense that it existed and when I still could not achieve that apex of pleasure in my own sex life I quit trying to.

I could enjoy sex to a degree, but as for an orgasm, let’s just say I’m owed some recognition from The Academy for my performances.

I think this comes back to sexual education. The male orgasm is acknowledged as necessary for reproduction. This leaves the part of the female genitalia in intercourse as merely a tool to achieve male orgasm. This is frighteningly problematic because the fundamental idea becomes that a female is a tool for male pleasure and we subconsciously teach children this idea through arguably our most primal behavior. How do we not expect this sexism to carry over into other parts of our society?

If it is acknowledged kids are going to have sex, and that the sex they will be having is not reproductive in nature, then, in teaching the anatomy of both male and female genitalia, it is in the least negligent to only teach the biological reaction of one gender and not the other. I would further press it is not only negligent but completely sexist to not teach the female orgasm as a biological response to intercourse.

Personally, I think pleasure based sexual education (along with a discussion on contraceptives and abstinence) is the ideal sexual education. I also feel that the word “pleasure” brings too heavy a stigma to hit mainstream schooling (at this time).

However, if presented to schools as their responsibility to teach proper and scientifically based anatomy, I believe that it is possible to get this information to girls (and boys) while avoiding the stigma of seeming to promote sexuality in a place that society deems inappropriate.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this or read any links to articles you think are relevant.

Until next time ❤